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Dear Heidi

Well, my girlfriend dumped me before the pandemic, as she likes pubbing and clubbing.

It not my idea of fun, but she said I was boring. Honestly, I want to meet someone and settle down. How do I meet the right one? The apps & dating sites frighten me and the bar scene is not me.

Alex, Bethnal Green

Oh Alex, it honestly sounds like you had a lucky escape.

There is much more to LGBTQ+ life than gay clubs and bars. Honestly, most of my friends found love through introductions by mutual friends or joining groups, some not directly linked to LGBTQ+ circles like art classes.

One or two friends met at the gym, or playing sports (I have listed some groups below). You sound far from boring. It is nice to hear from someone who is clearly a romantic.

Please do not be afraid to dip your toe into the apps. Like most things that are new, ask a friend for some advice and put down rules and boundaries that suit you. Look for someone who’s not into clubbing, but enjoys dinners and romantic walks. That would get my attention, my love!

Much love


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About the author

Heidi Gammon

Heidi Gammon is a qualified integrative counsellor incorporating CBT, Person Centered and Psychodynamic theories and has excellent knowledge in issues such as: adoption, LBGTQI+, bereavement, relationship issues, trauma, anxiety, infertility, stress and more.

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