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Today I want offer some advice to everyone about to go off on a summer break (apart from slapping on the sun cream, building your tan slowly not overdoing the alcohol intake). Many of us dream about a holiday romance, whether a passionate holiday fling or if we’re going away with a partner for the very first time.

Please be sensible! So many holiday romances struggle to go the distance especially if she lives in Germany and you are in Leeds. No matter how intense it was under the sun, is it really going to be a long-term thing when you are both back at work in separate countries?

Yes, I know of a few holidays romances that have gone on to be more than that. However, they are the exception. Suggesting to Pablo who you met on the sunny Copacabana beach in Rio De Janeiro that he comes to lives with you in the UK needs more than a few nights of lovemaking to make a momentous decision like that. And it can soon become a living hell if you have not thought long and hard about your choices. Trust me: I have seen some of my lovely friends do just that and not listen to reason when you point out it is not a good idea.

If you feel, as you brush the last bit of sand off your feet and head to the airport, that life will just not be the same without that new lover, suggest chatting online for a bit or email each other a few times before deciding to see each other again. If it really is The Real Thing you will be just as enthusiastic in three four months, or you you may have woken up to see it was just a beautiful but brief romantic episode

And if you’re planning your first holiday with a new lover, think about these simple steps.

Talk to one another before you go away. What do you both expect from one and other on the trip?

Agree who is paying for what and the budget you both have. Trust me: I have seem more arguments over this topic than you can believe.

Try not to pick a destination that either of you have been with ex partners. One comment about you and your former partner doing something together on a previous holiday can kill that loving feeling.

Do you snore? Yes, it can be a real romance killer and ruin a holiday. There are plenty of devices, lotions and potions to help you. The last thing you want is to wake finding your partner sleeping by the pool as you had kept them awake all night!

But most importantly, stay safe and have a wonderful summer!

For more brilliant advise, visit Ask Heidi here.

About the author

Heidi Gammon

Heidi Gammon is a qualified integrative counsellor incorporating CBT, Person Centered and Psychodynamic theories and has excellent knowledge in issues such as: adoption, LBGTQI+, bereavement, relationship issues, trauma, anxiety, infertility, stress and more.

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