Dating doesn’t come easy to all of us. Meeting new people and trying to get to know them on a deeper level can be a daunting task, especially after we’ve just experienced a global pandemic. The health crisis brought everything, including the dating world, to a complete standstill.
We don’t blame you if you’ve developed a fear of dating. Things are no longer how they used to be, and it takes a little bit of practice to get back into the game with confidence. If you feel anxious at the thought of chatting someone up or asking them for their number, don’t worry, we’re here to help. Here’s how you can overcome your fear of dating…
Take a look at your dating history.
Before you can evolve and overcome your fear of dating, you should reflect on your past and the mistakes you’ve possibly made. Is there a specific relationship that changed your views on dating? Are there any things you can do differently whilst dating? What do your ex-partners think about the relationship? Get a good grasp of your dating history and find where things seem to go wrong.
Take a deep breath.
The next thing you should do is take a deep breath and approach the situation with calmness. Going on a date with the jitters is normal but don’t let it control your emotions or actions. Approach your date with an open mind and don’t jump the gun.
Think about what you’ll say.
Silences in a conversation are normal, don’t think that you have to fill in every blank space. However, it’s always good to keep the conversation flowing. If you have trouble with this, think about some questions or topics before you go on your date. It’s important to show your date interest by asking them plenty of questions.
Try out dating apps like Be Naughty.
Sometimes all you need is a quick refresh and you’re good to go. If you’re scared of dating the traditional way, it could help to know that somebody is already into you before you have to approach them. Dating apps like Be Naughty can connect you to singles in your area that are looking for the same things as you.
Focus on what makes you a great catch.
When it comes to dating, confidence is key. Focus on what makes you a great catch and raise your expectations to this level. Don’t let anybody treat you like second best. If you’re not the person for them, simply move onto the next opportunity. If you want people to value you and your qualities, you’ll need to do the same.
Don’t fall too hard too fast.
A lot of people have a fear of dating because they simply fall too hard and too fast. We’re not saying you shouldn’t open up or be vulnerable, just be careful with the pace you go at. If you’ve only had one or two dates, you shouldn’t be throwing around the infamous “L-word”. This will also help you avoid getting hurt in the initial stages of meeting someone.
Don’t compare your date.
Everyone is unique, including yourself, so there’s no point in comparing your date to any past lovers or what you think a partner should look and act like. Accept that everyone is different and be open to characteristics that aren’t your usual type.
Play to your strengths.
Part of dating someone involves impressing them, which is why you should always play to your strengths. For example, if your date loves tennis, but you’re hopeless on the courts, take them to see a match instead of playing a game yourselves.
Accept the realities.
Finally, the harsh reality of dating is that you’re not always going to be liked back in return. However, don’t forget that the opposite is also true. You may not like every date you go on and it’s completely fine if you don’t, just be truthful and honest about your feelings.
Like anything in life, getting confident at dating will take time. Some people are natural born flirts, whilst others need a little more encouragement. If you’ve tried and tried but that you’re still not on the same vibe with that person, it’s probably a sign that you need to move on.
Sometimes all you need to be an expert at dating is a bit of instant chemistry. You’ll know when the right person goes along but, in the meantime, use our tips and tricks to keep your head in the dating game.