We sent our very own kinkster Miss Jezebel to the London Alternative Market in search of the best kinky Christmas presents. We think she enjoyed herself.
I’d turned up looking relatively vanilla, wearing leather trousers and a black top. First stop was Scarlet in Chains, who can kink up any outfit. Sophie has been handmaking custom made BDSM jewellery and accessories for almost 5 years. What I like is that it’s BDSM jewellery that I can wear to dinner with my mum without her realising what it is or, for non-parental nights out, as an accompaniment to a fetish outfit and everyone would know.
I have to admit that I did spend half the day swapping necklaces as I just couldn’t decide between the two. One had more metal and I loved the metal rings. The other had a gorgeous gem in the middle. In the end I went for the gem.
All Scarlet’s products are made of stainless steel, so I didn’t need to worry about allergies and for people like me, it’s good to know I can also swim and shower in them. That said, once I’d put on the chain bra top and belt, I wouldn’t be swimming anywhere. Anyway, it seems I made the right choice; both my mum and my fetish friends complimented me on my new necklace.
Next stop was the Kinky Emporium for some presents for, erm, sharing. Lea has created some really unique fluoro pieces and I fell in love with her fluoro and glow in the dark flogger. We tried leaving it in the bag overnight and found it still glowed in the dark for hours after it had last been exposed to the light; plenty of time to keep you busy through a dark, winter’s night. Of course, I took it home to test, ahead of Brighton’s Spank Xmas ball, and I can report those fluoro strings have quite the sting. The other thing I liked was that Lea can put an optional clip on the top of your flogger, so I can clip it onto my hot pants at Spank without having to worry about leaving my new toy at the club.
In keeping with my new fluoro flogger, I discovered Trussed UK had some of their kinky candles that also glowed in the dark, perfect for creating cool designs on your partner’s back.
After all that shopping I joined the workshop queue and discovered it was for the Kink Shrink. The Kink Shrink is an experienced therapist who, due to her passion for BDSM, has attracted a global clientèle who often want to be able to discuss what they really get up to after dark without the judgement they might feel with a regular therapist.
Her packed Q and A started with quite a serious question concerning some recent deaths due to accidents during breath play. When it’s consensual, when does it become manslaughter or murder? This is serious stuff and not at all what kink should be about. Pushing the boundaries can be fun, but never ever as an excuse for violent crime. Perpetrators should not be able to use the “kink gone wrong” defence.
We also debated when the best time is to tell someone you are dating about a mental health diagnosis. Everyone in the room agreed within three months, with some thinking it’s best to be upfront within a month.
Serious food for thought before heading to the bar!